Make Your Next Breakup A Beyoncé Breakup

As human beings, we all inevitably experience the woes of heartbreak and betrayal at some point in time. I’ve already compiled a list of the 50 Greatest Breakup Songs to help you sort through all of your emotions (HERE,) but these songs tackle the situation from every angle imaginable. If you try to weed through it to find your one true “breakup emotion,” you may just end up overwhelming the senses and make it that much more difficult to get through your heartache. This go around, I’m presenting you an opportunity to be proactive and empowered the next time someone decides to stomp on your heart. My advice to you is, of course, to make your next breakup a “Beyoncé Breakup.” Now, don’t succumb to the misconception that a proper “Beyoncé Breakup” is for women only… the sentiments and ideas are certainly gender neutral. Trust me, though, this method goes beyond just the “musical escape” we all need; this method will get your “Bootylicious” ass back into “Crazy In Love”-action faster than recite the bridge of “Countdown.” This kind of breakup goes beyond just the stories in the songs, it is a very specific energy and sentiment. Empower yourself! No matter WHAT he/she did to you, put your hand in his/her face and make your next break up a “Beyoncé Breakup.” Queen B knows best.

01. “RING THE ALARM”

“You can’t stay, you gotta go. Ain’t no other chicks spending your dough.”
Damn straight! You don’t have to let go if it means reaping the benefits of what’s rightfully yours. Put your damn foot down!

02. “SINGLE LADIES (PUT A RING ON IT)”

“Cause you had your turn, and now you gonna learn what it really feels like to miss me.”
Hey! You’re single now. Don’t you think it’s time you went out and had some fun? Please remind him/her that it’s their own fault. Uh-uh-oh!

03. “IRREPLACEABLE”

“You must not know bout me, I can have another you in a minute. Matter fact, he’ll be here in a minute.”
This is the grandmommy of all Beyoncé breakup songs. Kick his/her ass OUT, and kindly remind them that they can be replaced at the snap of your fingers.

04. “BILLS BILLS BILLS”

“You triflin’ good for nothing type of brother. Silly me, why haven’t I found another?”
If “No Scrubs” didn’t get the message through, “Bills Bills Bills” is going to. Is your sig-o taking advantage of you and your hard earned money? The curb is where they belong. Goodbye.

05. “BEST THING I NEVER HAD”

“Thank God you blew it, thank God I dodged a bullet. I’m so over you, baby good looking out.”
Just remember, they’re not the one!  You’ll be looking back at their sorry ass years from now laughing at their misery. More likely than not, they’ll be the one missing you.

06. “WHY DON’T YOU LOVE ME?”

“There’s nothing not to need about me. Maybe you’re just not the one, or maybe you’re just plain dumb.”
I know you can’t understand why they don’t love you, cause let’s be honest, you are PERFECT. Just remember, it’s on them! Go find someone who will appreciate all that you are.

07. “SAY MY NAME”

“First of all, let me say, I am not the one to sit around and be played.”
Oh they’re CHEATING? You know whatsup. Catch them in the act and then promptly rid yourself of their stupidity.

08. “FREAKUM DRESS”

“I think I’m ready. Been locked up in the house way too long. It’s time to get it, cause once again he’s out doing wrong.”
You already know exactly what you need to do: Rebound. So go get out there and MAKE THEM LOOK. All eyes should be on you and your sexy, newly single self.

09. “IF I WERE A BOY”

“It’s a little too late for you to come back, say it’s just a mistake, think I’d forgive you like that. If you thought I would wait for you, you thought wrong.”
So let’s get a little serious now. You know he/she is treating you wrong, and you know you’d never do that to them. How about a bit of a reality check?

10. “ME MYSELF & I”

“So controlling. You said you loved me, but you don’t.”
No matter what he/she did to you, you will always have yourself and that is all you will ever need! This is some real talk from Queen B.

11. “BEAUTIFUL LIAR”

“It’s not the worth the drama for a beautiful liar”
Playas gon’ play. Take it out on his/her cheating ass after you have kicked it to the curb where it belongs.

12. “SURVIVOR”

“Now that you’re out of my life I’m so much better. Thought that I’d be weak without you, but I’m stronger.”
There is no better way to empower yourself than this Destiny’s Child masterpiece. You know you’re better off without them, so always remember that you are a “Survivor” and you’re never “gon’ give up.”

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